Blessed Are the Pure in Spirit

Proverbs 6:20-35

What’s the temptation most prevalent in church today? And that’s a hard question to answer - how do you quantify and qualify. But as a pastor, what do I see as a major problem? I see that sexual immorality is one of the greatest moral epidemic facing the church. Consider these statistics by the Barna Research Group - “Overall, 21% of youth pastors and 14% of pastors admit they currently struggle with using porn. 87% of pastors who use porn feel a great sense of shame about it. 55% of pastors who use porn say they live in constant fear of being discovered.” Now, these statistics come from a book published in 2016. There, it also said that 54 percent of Christian young adults ages 18 to 24 seek out porn regularly. In some cities, it’s no longer uncommon for unmarried Christian couples to cohabit. Pastors there have to address this issue. Even in Singapore, some churches who plan retreats have to explain to worshipers who are boyfriend and girlfriend why they can’t room together, as they’re used to rooming together on holidays. Now, I’m not discounting various reasons given like saving money while spending time together - but I’m questioning the wisdom in light of the Scriptures and such temptation today. The fact that pastors admit to struggling, shows it’s very prevalent. And not just today - Paul had to address sexual immorality in all his epistles. The Bible is full of sexual failures among Old Testament sinners and saints - Lamech had two wives, Noah and nakedness, Sodom and Gomorrah, Lot’s daughters committed incest with him, Abraham and Hagar, Judah and Tamar, the Levite, his concubine and the Benjamites, David and Bathsheba, Amnon and Tamar. Even Solomon - the preacher who wrote Proverbs - fell. Knowledge of truth doesn’t necessarily mean wisdom to be holy. But today we see wise words - given by God himself, through a sinful king, delivered by a weak preacher. But this is God’s holy and inerrant Word. And we shall explore it in 2 sections - firstly, the law of a Holy Father; and secondly, the warning against seduction.

Firstly, the law of a Holy Father. In this chapter, Solomon teaches his son various things - how not to be scammed, how to make up with a friend, how to work hard - to know what God hates. So we know straight off, Solomon’s not just teaching his son good behavior, but teaching him to please God. In the end, these are the laws of God our holy father. And Solomon teaches his son how to please God by being pure in spirit - to be sexually pure. And his emphasis is on parents teaching their children wisdom on purity. Verse 20 - “My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother.” And verse 23 - “For the commandment is a lamp; and the law is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life.” Solomon emphasized “thy father’s commandment” and “the law of thy mother” which were given to “my son.” Meaning, who teaches children sexual morality? Parents. Yes, many schools have sex education. In Singapore, it starts at primary 5. But kind of sex ed is it? In some countries, schools handout condoms to children as young as 10. But our children also learn it from their own exposure to the internet; some know far more about sexuality than you. They also learn it from peers. But the chief educators must be parents. The parent speaks to his son - my son; he calls himself thy father, she calls herself thy mother. This speaks of love, responsibility, and concern for spiritual and moral well-being. And it’s true that some parents find it hard to teach. It could be cultural - Asian Christians find it hard to communicate. Fathers won’t seek forgiveness, but give a drumstick at dinner. They teach their children to deal with conflict, anger, or even sexual temptation by telling them to exercise. But Christ must transform culture! What’s needed are the laws, commandments, and reproofs of instruction. Psalm 78 instructs fathers to warn their children not to go the way of their ancestors, who lusted after temporal pleasure, but to show them the beauty God’s promised land.

So parents teach their children because they love them. This means that parents themselves must know God’s laws, commandments, and reproofs. They themselves must overcome their sins - to know their own weakness and desires after a pure spirit. That’s why it’s not just giving instructions, but reproofs. We teach as we’ve experienced. We teach out of weakness but also out of victory, that weak sinners like us can overcome. So parents must keep holy for the sake of our children as well. But here’s the problem - many of you may not have triumphed. There are those here who struggle with sexual immorality. That’s why there’s such a thing as dirty old men, not just youth who must flee youthful lusts, but older men who haven’t learned to flee youthful lusts. But children - since God instructs parents to teach you, you’re to listen to them. Learn what the Bible says on sexual temptation. Not to listen would be life-threatening.

God’s laws, commandments, and reproofs are invaluable. Here we see the importance of God’s law to rescue us from sexual temptation. Laws and commandments are God’s rules for right living - positive commandments and negative prohibitions. The son must bind them to his heart and neck. Like a leash, the law restrains. When it comes to sexual immorality, we must have restraining laws that guard the heart. Not just go for a run but seek the Lord, repent, control your lust. Not just don’t use the computer in your room, but let daddy and mama be accountable - we will pray and help you to keep God’s laws. His laws must affect us - when we sleep or wake, verse 22. These words here - binding, waking or sleeping - remind us of Deuteronomy 6. There, God commanded fathers to turn their children’s hearts to God’s ways, to bind the laws on their heads and hands, to speak to them when they wake - but here it’s so they’d be restrained from sexual immorality. How do we teach? And we do it positively - verse 23 - the laws are a lamp and light. They lead us to God, to life, to see that in God there are pleasures forevermore. But they’re also reproofs. Sometimes laws aren’t enough to restrain. We love our sin! We know, but we still do. We don’t want purity enough. We don’t hunger for it. We’re not prepared to radically amputate our sinning arm or eye to forsake sin and escape hell. So someone else must do it for us. Reproofs are disciplinary correction. And verse 23 states they lead to greatest happiness - the way of life. So when we receive reproofs - we’re freed from the bonds of sin and experience the blessings of pure hearts and actions - to live. Blessed are the pure in spirit. Now, how does the law help us?

We see the purpose of the law. Verse 24 - the law keeps “thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman.” It’s a life and death matter. It’s not just an affair or watching porn. It’s not just going to that website. It is evil! The law keeps us away from the evil or strange woman. Now, these two phrases describe an immoral woman, a wayward wife who seduces others to sin; a seductress, an adulteress. Now to be clear, don’t accuse the Bible of sexism. Proverbs 8 uses the illustration of a woman to describe wisdom. Proverbs 31 uses the illustration of a woman to describe virtue. But the woman here personifies sexual immorality. And that’s a catch all word to refer to adultery, fornication, pornography, homosexuality, polygamy, bestiality; the list goes on. And we can’t make an exhaustive list because Romans 1:30 says our minds and hearts will always invent new evils. So sexual immorality is anything that seduces us to break the seventh commandment - any sex outside a marriage between husband and wife. Fornication is adultery against future or possible spouses. Masturbation and pornography are adultery with yourself and a fantasy person. To be clear, it’s not just action but sinful desire. Jesus said that anyone who lusts after a woman in his heart is already guilty of adultery. That’s why we need God’s laws. They restrain, reprove, and bind our hearts to God and make us wary about sexual immorality, so that we may have life. So to be clear, God gives us laws not just so we’d be restrained, but so that we’d live. Blessed are the pure in spirit.

Secondly, the warning against seduction. Dearly beloved, we know the laws and commandments. We even fear the reproofs. Many are fearful of being caught. Many have experienced the reproofs of being caught. Laws are good - but laws don’t always work. But if only we knew the evil and destructiveness of sexual immorality, we’d see the wisdom of refraining ourselves. So here, Solomon warned his son against getting entangled with sexual immorality. He warned against its destructiveness. Verse 24 describes the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman. The word “flattery” means “smoothness” or “slipperiness.” Seduction influences us with all sorts of reasons. Oh, I’m just befriending her, as Christians we’re supposed to reach out. No, I’m not really lusting - it’s just research on the internet. I’m just spending time with him, he’s so dreamy; he’ll marry me one day. I’m just meeting my natural physical needs - after all, God created me with these needs. You see how quickly we’re seduced by the lust that’s in us? Instead of seeing evil, we see beauty in sexual immorality; we’re taken in by her fine eyes, verse 25. But seduction is dangerous - the devil uses this sin to bait a person so he can take his life. Verse 26 says it’s like a small piece of bread, or a bit of cheese in a mouse trap, but you pay with your precious life - which is another way of describing your immortal soul. How so? Eve gave into her lust of the eyes when she saw the fruit, it was pleasant to the eyes; it was good for food - the lust of the flesh; and it was able to make her wise - the pride of life - the day thou eatest the fruit, thou shalt surely die. Sin kills. But such sin in a Christian leads to enslavement.

In the recent KSYF workshop on purity, Elder Jason taught how sexual immorality is like a drug - it’s addictive. People keep going back - they can’t stop. It’s destructive. That’s why verse 27-28 calls seduction a fire. Verses 27-28 - “Can a man take fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned? Can one go upon hot coals and his feet not be burned?” The imagery of fire is not random. Deuteronomy 22:22 requires capital punishment for adultery. So if sexual sins are not that severe, why did God attach the death penalty to it? It’s because it’s not just seductive - it’s destructive. What good has ever come out of adultery? Nothing. Nothing good has ever come out of pornography. It’s destructive. That’s why Revelation 21:8 says that the sexually immoral shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone. Sexual immorality destroys. We see this in the lives of the Old Testament saints. David was willing to let his kingdom risk defeat because he was at home watching a bathing woman. Samson was destroyed because he couldn’t reject the incessant questioning of a beautiful woman. Many believers risk ruin, broken families, alienation from church because they fall into their lusts. Yes, believers who struggle and fall into it will have many hurts in this life. Yes, they’ll be saved by the grace of God, but without experiencing victory on earth through sanctification. But those who give themselves to lust willingly - who don’t struggle, who love their sin - will die in their unbelief. Beware of sin’s destructiveness. It’ll never satisfy. What affair ever has a happy ending? What porn will ever satisfy? You’ll get burned.

And not just that, there’ll also be guilt. Verse 29 says, “So he that goeth in to his neighbor’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent.” Guilt is certain. How? Verses 30-33 makes a comparison between food and sex. In one case, one steals food; and in the other, one steals sex. When you steal food - especially when you’re starving, people will not generally despise you, verse 30. And when he’s caught stealing, he can expect mercy - he can actually pay back the debt. In fact, in verse 31, he can make a seven-fold restoration. Now what does this mean? In all the Old Testament, nothing demands a seven-fold restoration. But the number 7 symbolizes a perfect restoration - even by giving everything you own, even your house. Now, stealing an ox requires you to pay back 5 times. Stealing a sheep requires you to pay back 4 times - this is what David demanded of the man in Nathan’s parable. That’s why when Zacchaeus was convicted of his sins, he told Jesus he’d restore four-fold of what he had stolen and will give half of his good to the poor. Now, by doing this, he was giving everything he had owned - his whole house. You can pay back - you can remove guilt.

But what about sexual immorality? A sexually immoral man can’t say that hunger drove him to commit this sin. It doesn’t sit well. One might be excused for stealing for hunger, but no one is excused for fornication. It’s not excusable like hunger. It’s not body destroying - it’s soul destroying. That’s why verse 33 says - “A wound and dishonor shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away.” Sexual immorality wounds your name and brings dishonor to you and your family. Such a reproach is never wiped away. As much as we remember David as a man after God’s own heart, we still remember that he was an adulterer who got Bathsheba’s husband killed. As much as remember Samson tearing down Dagon’s temple, we remember him losing his hair and dignity because he lusted after a woman.

But more than that, we see the penalty for unconfessed, unrepentant sexual immorality. Verses 34-35 - “For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts.” Sexual immorality leads to anger, jealousy, vengeance. And here the context is the anger of man that was sinned against. He will not regard any ransom. He won’t be appeased even though the fornicator gives many gifts. The penalty is rage, it’s judgment on the day of vengeance. And folks, we know that it’s not just any man who’s offended. We read beyond it and see that Christ himself - the God-man is angry against fornicators - who have sinned against him. And on that day of vengeance - that judgment day, he will not spare. And the sobering thing is this - laws, commandments, and reproofs are all insufficient - there’s a weakness and a lust in all of us that demands satisfaction. And the sad truth is also that all the warnings on the destructiveness, guilt, and penalty of sexual immorality also don’t prevent people from committing it. Laws and warnings alone are insufficient. Just as laws don’t always restrain us, neither do warnings. That’s why we need a savior!

God has given unto us his only begotten Son - God’s Son as well as the son of Solomon. Our Lord Jesus would’ve grown up hearing these words. And he kept himself from sin. When he was tempted in the wilderness - he was tempted with lust. Sexual lust. Remember? When Satan showed him all the kingdoms of the world, he said they’d be his, if Jesus worshiped him. Kings who conquered empires would take the wives of their captives - just like Absalom took David’s wives. But Jesus rejected temptation because the words of his holy father bound his heart and neck. He’d serve only God. And when he endured the cross, to give his life for his people, he purchased for himself a bride - his church. And if we’re faithful to him, loving his laws, being grateful for his salvation, we can have victory over our sexual immorality, bound not so much by fear and law, but we’re bound by love for him. That’s why on that day of vengeance, we are not counted among the sexually immoral because he paid the penalty for our sin.

Having victory over sexual immorality is not easy. Some of you try by looking at the penalty and shame - but you still fall. Some of you impose strict restriction and laws on yourself - even your children. But you and they still fall. They will find a way around it. But if you deepen in your love for Christ, hate this sin, and seek help - being unashamed to seek help, you will find victory.

1. The Law of a Holy Father

A. Its emphasis

B. Its guidance

C. Its purpose

2. The Warning Against Seduction

A. Its destructiveness

B. Its guilt

C. Its penalty